“Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out.” – George Carlin “Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit.” – George Carlin
GEORGE CARLIN YOUTUBE AND STUFF CRACK
“I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.” – George Carlin “Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.” – George Carlin Maybe this time it’ll work.” – George Carlin “I think people should be allowed to do what they want. “Careful, if you think too much, they’ll take you away.” – George Carlin “Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.” – George Carlin
I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.” – George Carlin “Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. “I don’t have pet peeves – I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.” – George Carlin
“A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.” – George Carlin “One can never know for sure what a deserted area can look like.” – George Carlin “Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. “The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.” – George Carlin “If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.” – George Carlin But there is an ‘I’ in independence, individuality, and integrity.” – George Carlin “I often warn people: ‘Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, ‘There is no ‘I’ in team.’ What you should tell them is, ‘Maybe not. “When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foot’s hands.” – George Carlin “How is it possible to have a civil war?” – George Carlin “Atheism is a non-prophet organization.” – George Carlin “If it requires a uniform, it’s a worthless endeavor.” – George Carlin “I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.” – George Carlin “Religion is like a pair of shoes…Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.” – George Carlin “Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” – George Carlin “By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.” – George Carlin “If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?” – George Carlin “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” – George Carlin
It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts.” – George Carlin “When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. “In America, anyone can become president. “Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.” – George Carlin “We’ve added years to life, not life to years.” – George Carlin “Don’t just teach your children to read…teach them to question everything that they read…teach them to question everything.” – George Carlin “That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.” – George Carlin “Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.” – George Carlin We’ve added years to life, not life to years.” – George Carlin
GEORGE CARLIN YOUTUBE AND STUFF HOW TO
We’ve learned how to make a living but not a life. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. “We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.” – George Carlin “Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.” – George Carlin “May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.” – George Carlin
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